Pregnancy is great!
It bequeaths you with an entirely new spectrum of sensations, you find yourself into a completely different and wondrous sate of being, and unsuspected horizons suddenly bloom in front of you. The potential of it! The promise!
Being with a baby changes your life by making everything seem better.
Pregnancy is tough.
It takes your body over, it hijacks your brain, and it pretty much ruins your sex life. The pain. The weight...
Expecting a baby changes your life by messing you up and psyching you out.
A temporary insanity sums it up. One day you're confident and cloudlessly happy, hysterical and miserable the next. There's no middle way about pregnancy. At least for me there isn't.
Johnny is a planned baby, if there was ever one. We made sure we're exactly at the right place, that it was the right time, that we were in the right position to take the right step. We timed the whole thing carefully and educated ourselves with the sole purpose of making it easier on ourselves, and to up our chances of enjoying the experience as much as possible. Turns out that being schedule-savvy, wanting a baby even beyond a shadow of a doubt, avidly reading about pregnancy, preparing mentally and emotionally for labor, and getting the stuff you need to take care of a baby doesn't quite make you ready. The fact that John and I are also a very flexible, fairly unpretentious, and a spontaneous couple with a good sense of humor helped some, but let me tell you - nothing prepares you for this. If you're pregnant for the first time, you're in for a ride. Only nine months of being pregnant will make you understand what it is to be pregnant, and no amount of stories, books, films, or classes will fully clarify it for you.
In short, pregnancy is an empirical endeavor. And frankly, I think this is one of the best parts of it, another best part being the fact that you are growing a tiny human inside you.
Therefore, I am not going to even try ruining the surprise for you. What I want to do is to list the things that helped me stay sane and comfortable up until now, just for the sake of posterity. And if you find this kit useful, well, good for you!
1. I was in an okay shape when I got pregnant: I had quit smoking and had gradually lost exactly 10 kg in the months leading to conception thanks to a combination of exercise and a healthy diet. I was never the athletic type (haha, now that's an understatement), and I don't have the patience to count calories or follow a strict eating regime, but I pulled myself together and put enough effort into the whole thing so that at the end I was pretty happy with the way I felt and looked.
This didn't change in the first trimester, but I have to be honest - I should've I kept it up. I went jogging and did sit-ups till my 4th month, walked dogs till my 6th month, and went spinning in the gym till the 7th month, but I wish I was even more active. It's not even just the weight I gained - I principally tend to plump up quite fast, my metabolism is slow, the early pregnancy nausea, hormonal craziness and exhaustion don't help much, and hell, I am lazy. But all the physical changes made me realize that the stronger your body is, the better it will deal with the pregnancy effects and side effects.
Next time around I am totally going to train as for a marathon. Which wouldn't be a big stretch of a comparison.
2. Nausea. Yuck. I only felt sick when I was hungry - something about increased stomach acid - but that didn't make it easier as in the first two months I was ravenous most of the time. I didn't get cravings, but a sudden and strong hunger, something I rarely felt before. And since I hate ginger, I used sea bands. They worked for me, and the nausea disappeared almost the minute I entered the fourth month, so that was that.
3. Boobs. Not to brag, but I was large-chested to begin with, and pregnancy turned me into something of a porn star looking person. Which isn't as glamorous as it sounds. Buying the perfect bra became an idée fixe ever since. Bras suddenly ceased to be lingerie but life-saving items. We're talking itchy nipples, painful swelling, intolerance to underwires, and sensitivity to just about any fabric out there. I haven't found the perfect bra yet - soft and elastic, yet supportive, good looking, and not enormously expensive - but I'm soon entering the new and exciting era of breastfeeding so I guess things will only go downhill from here anyway.
4. Heartburn. Double yuck. One word: TUMS. The large, berry flavored kind. There isn't much else to do about it, so just suck it.
Oh, well, there's the idea that eating less acidic and spicy foods might help, but that all sounds like a big nonsense to me. The last thing you need while going through such hard thing as pregnancy is to deprive yourself of the foods you crave.
5. Stretch marks. Didn't get any on my belly, which is most definitely awesome, and yes, you should envy me. Not a single stretch! I got some on my thighs, but I always do when I gain weight because I always tend to store fat in my thighs and hips first. I didn't bother with specialized expensive lotions. Palmers cocoa butter and Yes To Carrots Body Butter did a good job instead.
Of course, exercise, regular exfoliation and massaging help too. And you should be ashamed of yourself if you don't exfoliate.
6. Back pain. Bad posture + hormones + big boobs + occupational hazard = constant and strong back pain. The pregnancy just added to my otherwise troubled back (I spend considerable amounts of time sitting at a desk and writing) so I had no choice but to look into lumbar support. I can't afford an ergonomic chair, so I went with a mesh lumbar support for my office chair and for the car seat, and a foot rest. Good stuff.
7. As my pregnancy progressed, I began needing more support not only for my back, but also for my growing belly. A maternity pillow did the job. I call it "The Nest" and I think I am addicted to it.
8. I wear nothing but warm-ups these days. I say, stock up on these and worry no more.
9. That, and running shoes.
(Flannel sweatpants and warm-ups are so damn generic and style-less that they are a great motivation to lose the baby weight as soon as possible after the baby comes so you can wear uncomfortable heels and tight jeans and sexy silk tops once again.)
10. Nothing says you're growing old more clearly the purchase of a pair of Dr. Scholl orthopedic soles. But buy them, regardless.
11. Orthopedic slippers too! I couldn't believe I chose to pay $50 for a such thing and ignore the new spring platform sandals at Marshalls, but here we are.
12. Body ball. They say it's useful to have it around for labor, and I also like to bounce on it to relieve back pain and shoulder tension.
13. And while we're at it, let's add the maternity support belt. Carrying a big baby boy from 35 weeks onward justifies any gimmick you might have found ludicrous before you got pregnant.
14. Night snacks. A big no-no. I only did it for a few weeks in the first trimester and made myself stop under the fear of gaining even faster than I was, and of course, because I didn't want to risk the dental implications. Your teeth and gums suffer a lot during pregnancy as it is. So, whenever I wake up in the small hours with the munchies, I have a banana. Bananas are a natural anti-acid agent too!
15. Baby shopping. Amazon.com. 'Nuff said.
16. Cash. Pregnancy is expensive. Babies are expensive. Save up while you can! Or better, have a big tacky baby shower and get everything you need for free from friends and family. Don't be like me, all counterculture and stuff.
17. Baby book. That, and the Internet. The unknown is scary, so throw some light on things. Saved me many worries, reading and learning that I am not the only one going through such and such symptom, and that I probably won't die a horrible death from it.
18. Ice cream. Not healthy or diet-friendly, but it makes me feel great about myself every single time. The cold soothes me, and the sweet perks me up. Or vica versa.
19. Someone to whine to. Even if you are a single mom-to-be, find a friend to take it all out to. I whine to John for every possible reason. It helps. Some. Mostly it puts him off and makes him as cranky as I am, but it helps.
20. Journal. Whining in writing is even better. Plus, I collect nursery decoration ideas, thoughts about parenting, photos of my belly, ultrasound images, and letters to the Baby in it. It's fun, and it passes the time.
21. Wax service. Go ahead, laugh; I used to find it funny too. What's hilarious, however, is trying to see what's happening down there once your belly grows big enough. Unless you don't mind going wild and growing a full bush (which is perfectly fine until labor days comes and your doctor has to find his way with a map, haha), find a good waxing place and under no circumstances try to shave relying only on touch and memory. Not being able to see guarantees a disaster. I should know.
22. Speaking of doctors, I am definitely changing my OB with the second baby. He's a great specialist, but...I don't know, he could be just a little less rushed (and a little less Republican, for that matter). Also, the clinical center is a bit too busy, the medical assistants are a bit too casual, and overall, I was left with the impression that it's all business. First time expectant moms deserve to be spoiled.
23. I worked 3 jobs till just before I entered month 7, and I am glad I did. Keeping myself busy kept me sane.
24. Swimming and long baths. Heaven!
25. Eat well, sleep as much as you can, drink lots of water. Make love. Take your vitamins. Take a trip. Take advantage of all the attention you're getting. At times I found even those simple things hard to do, but pregnancy is all about taking a good care of yourself so you can grow a healthy baby. It's a state in between, and it won't last forever, so enjoy yourself.
I surely am.
1. I was in an okay shape when I got pregnant: I had quit smoking and had gradually lost exactly 10 kg in the months leading to conception thanks to a combination of exercise and a healthy diet. I was never the athletic type (haha, now that's an understatement), and I don't have the patience to count calories or follow a strict eating regime, but I pulled myself together and put enough effort into the whole thing so that at the end I was pretty happy with the way I felt and looked.
This didn't change in the first trimester, but I have to be honest - I should've I kept it up. I went jogging and did sit-ups till my 4th month, walked dogs till my 6th month, and went spinning in the gym till the 7th month, but I wish I was even more active. It's not even just the weight I gained - I principally tend to plump up quite fast, my metabolism is slow, the early pregnancy nausea, hormonal craziness and exhaustion don't help much, and hell, I am lazy. But all the physical changes made me realize that the stronger your body is, the better it will deal with the pregnancy effects and side effects.
Next time around I am totally going to train as for a marathon. Which wouldn't be a big stretch of a comparison.
2. Nausea. Yuck. I only felt sick when I was hungry - something about increased stomach acid - but that didn't make it easier as in the first two months I was ravenous most of the time. I didn't get cravings, but a sudden and strong hunger, something I rarely felt before. And since I hate ginger, I used sea bands. They worked for me, and the nausea disappeared almost the minute I entered the fourth month, so that was that.
3. Boobs. Not to brag, but I was large-chested to begin with, and pregnancy turned me into something of a porn star looking person. Which isn't as glamorous as it sounds. Buying the perfect bra became an idée fixe ever since. Bras suddenly ceased to be lingerie but life-saving items. We're talking itchy nipples, painful swelling, intolerance to underwires, and sensitivity to just about any fabric out there. I haven't found the perfect bra yet - soft and elastic, yet supportive, good looking, and not enormously expensive - but I'm soon entering the new and exciting era of breastfeeding so I guess things will only go downhill from here anyway.
4. Heartburn. Double yuck. One word: TUMS. The large, berry flavored kind. There isn't much else to do about it, so just suck it.
Oh, well, there's the idea that eating less acidic and spicy foods might help, but that all sounds like a big nonsense to me. The last thing you need while going through such hard thing as pregnancy is to deprive yourself of the foods you crave.
5. Stretch marks. Didn't get any on my belly, which is most definitely awesome, and yes, you should envy me. Not a single stretch! I got some on my thighs, but I always do when I gain weight because I always tend to store fat in my thighs and hips first. I didn't bother with specialized expensive lotions. Palmers cocoa butter and Yes To Carrots Body Butter did a good job instead.
Of course, exercise, regular exfoliation and massaging help too. And you should be ashamed of yourself if you don't exfoliate.
6. Back pain. Bad posture + hormones + big boobs + occupational hazard = constant and strong back pain. The pregnancy just added to my otherwise troubled back (I spend considerable amounts of time sitting at a desk and writing) so I had no choice but to look into lumbar support. I can't afford an ergonomic chair, so I went with a mesh lumbar support for my office chair and for the car seat, and a foot rest. Good stuff.
7. As my pregnancy progressed, I began needing more support not only for my back, but also for my growing belly. A maternity pillow did the job. I call it "The Nest" and I think I am addicted to it.
8. I wear nothing but warm-ups these days. I say, stock up on these and worry no more.
9. That, and running shoes.
(Flannel sweatpants and warm-ups are so damn generic and style-less that they are a great motivation to lose the baby weight as soon as possible after the baby comes so you can wear uncomfortable heels and tight jeans and sexy silk tops once again.)
10. Nothing says you're growing old more clearly the purchase of a pair of Dr. Scholl orthopedic soles. But buy them, regardless.
11. Orthopedic slippers too! I couldn't believe I chose to pay $50 for a such thing and ignore the new spring platform sandals at Marshalls, but here we are.
12. Body ball. They say it's useful to have it around for labor, and I also like to bounce on it to relieve back pain and shoulder tension.
13. And while we're at it, let's add the maternity support belt. Carrying a big baby boy from 35 weeks onward justifies any gimmick you might have found ludicrous before you got pregnant.
14. Night snacks. A big no-no. I only did it for a few weeks in the first trimester and made myself stop under the fear of gaining even faster than I was, and of course, because I didn't want to risk the dental implications. Your teeth and gums suffer a lot during pregnancy as it is. So, whenever I wake up in the small hours with the munchies, I have a banana. Bananas are a natural anti-acid agent too!
15. Baby shopping. Amazon.com. 'Nuff said.
16. Cash. Pregnancy is expensive. Babies are expensive. Save up while you can! Or better, have a big tacky baby shower and get everything you need for free from friends and family. Don't be like me, all counterculture and stuff.
17. Baby book. That, and the Internet. The unknown is scary, so throw some light on things. Saved me many worries, reading and learning that I am not the only one going through such and such symptom, and that I probably won't die a horrible death from it.
18. Ice cream. Not healthy or diet-friendly, but it makes me feel great about myself every single time. The cold soothes me, and the sweet perks me up. Or vica versa.
19. Someone to whine to. Even if you are a single mom-to-be, find a friend to take it all out to. I whine to John for every possible reason. It helps. Some. Mostly it puts him off and makes him as cranky as I am, but it helps.
20. Journal. Whining in writing is even better. Plus, I collect nursery decoration ideas, thoughts about parenting, photos of my belly, ultrasound images, and letters to the Baby in it. It's fun, and it passes the time.
21. Wax service. Go ahead, laugh; I used to find it funny too. What's hilarious, however, is trying to see what's happening down there once your belly grows big enough. Unless you don't mind going wild and growing a full bush (which is perfectly fine until labor days comes and your doctor has to find his way with a map, haha), find a good waxing place and under no circumstances try to shave relying only on touch and memory. Not being able to see guarantees a disaster. I should know.
22. Speaking of doctors, I am definitely changing my OB with the second baby. He's a great specialist, but...I don't know, he could be just a little less rushed (and a little less Republican, for that matter). Also, the clinical center is a bit too busy, the medical assistants are a bit too casual, and overall, I was left with the impression that it's all business. First time expectant moms deserve to be spoiled.
23. I worked 3 jobs till just before I entered month 7, and I am glad I did. Keeping myself busy kept me sane.
24. Swimming and long baths. Heaven!
25. Eat well, sleep as much as you can, drink lots of water. Make love. Take your vitamins. Take a trip. Take advantage of all the attention you're getting. At times I found even those simple things hard to do, but pregnancy is all about taking a good care of yourself so you can grow a healthy baby. It's a state in between, and it won't last forever, so enjoy yourself.
I surely am.
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